Pain-drunk in public

I’ve talked with a lot of different types of people that have as much pain as I do, and it’s been a very interesting and educational experience, and I am grateful for it because it helps me get through this craziness. But I don’t recall ever asking about what being in pain for long periods does to a person’s mood. So here’s my version.

For me, I might as well be hammered. (Keep in mind I’ve never actually been drunk from alcohol before. I’m not against drinking, I’m Irish, I just don’t tolerate alcohol well because of my health.)

I was out running some errands, and my pain hit me like a train. At first, it’s exhausting, and it makes it hard for me to be in a good mood and keep up with conversations. As I push through this, my bitchy mood continues, the pain gets worse, but suddenly, everything becomes funny. I become a loud smartass. I can’t help it. I just seem to like to speak my mind. I don’t really know why it happens, but I’m glad it does. It helps me get through things that would otherwise be impossible. And no subsequent hangover, unless I really overdo it. Then it does unfortunately carry over to the next day. There is the risk of getting kicked out of the K-mart or wherever I happen to be, but I have enough self control to keep that from happening. At least for now.

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